Saturday, 18 October 2003

Blah. I got the photos I took up North developed today. I should have waited though. The photos are mostly great - some beautiful ones of my nieces and nephews. Problem is I also got them scanned on to CD so I could e-mail them to people and they stuffed up the CD! I just checked it and there's a red line through all my favourite photos! I can't go back there tomorrow to complain and make them do it again because Mum took the negatives to make copies. This is something to consider though because I'd been thinking that when I go travelling I should just get the photos put on to CD instead of developed... then I could send the CDs home regularly for storage and just get the best ones printed when I get back. I'm sure I'll figure it out :)
Just reviewed my health insurance too and it looks like I should be able to get quite a bit of money back from them after all! YAY!!
Spent the day with mum today - it was nice. We did a spot of shopping, had some lunch then went to see a movie - The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. It wasn't exactly what I expected but it was pretty cool - cleverly written and the special effects were great. The Nautilus was awesome.
Almost went to see Kill Bill but we'll probably do that next time. I want to see Tomb Raider 2 also. They're playing the Indiana Jones trilogy soon on TV. Triple YAY!
Started sorting through my photos tonight. I never realised I had so many. I threw a lot out and am going to have to invest in a few more albums and sort them properly in a timeline. That'll be a huge job. What's the bet I don't do it..
I also remembered another project tonight. One I've been wanting to do for a long time, and that is to re-transcribe a book I once found in an op-shop and have it re-published. I need to find out the legalities of it etc.
Wonder if maci's uncle made Grand Chief?

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Friday, 17 October 2003

Ha! Curt's being tricky.
So guys, what do you think of this: http://www.xanga.com/home.aspx?user=spankyfrog
I'm really bummed with the editing and publishing tools currently supplied by Blogger. I really want a more simple feel to my blog but I can't be arsed playing around with it.
One thing I don't like about Xanga is it seems 'TOO' pre-fab. Also, I want a publisher and host that's going to be around for a long time, not some fly-by-night job.
I had so much to say here tonight but I feel completely buggered right now. I might go to bed shortly.

xx

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Thursday, 9 October 2003

I think maci is the only one who reads my blog these days - which is not such a bad thing. I always write here like I'm talking to her anyway so I'm going to post my response to her comment here.
Yes I saw dolphins. I was up North staying in my nephew's beach house at Watego's Beach which is in Byron Bay. Byron Bay is Australia's most Easterly point and it's an absolute treasure. A tourism boom over the last few years has spoilt it a bit but I don't think it will ever lose its sparkle and it always felt like the closest thing to 'home' to me. I've lived there on and off over the years but it's really a lot like a NeverNeverland you know? You can really get stuck there. Still, if I ever did decide to write or have a family, I'm pretty sure that's where I'd go. Well, near there anyway.
So as I was saying it's Australia's most Easterly point and the point itself is marked by a lighthouse. Watego's beach is nestled just to the left of the lighthouse so you really see open sea and a craggy island called Julian Rocks which is popular with scuba divers. As you can imagine then when you're there you get to see lots of whales and dolphins. Dolphins are so playful they surf in and out of incoming waves. I hope one day you do get to see them in the wild because I think that's when you get a true sense of their nature.

Why the family reunion? As you know one of my sisters (Kat) lives in Perth with her beautiful family which is made up of a husband and 3 gorgeous little girls with a fourth baby on the way. Perth is on the other side of the country from me in Western Australia. Since she moved there about 7 years ago she's only been back over the East Coast once and that was when I was in London. This time they managed to save up for the whole family to come over and stay up North because her husband's sister was supposed to be getting married (but the wedding fell through). Since my other sister Elise lives in Byron Bay and my two brothers live in Brisbane (about 1.5 hours drive North from Byron) it seemed logical that we should all try to make it up there especially considering the state of Mum's health. It seemed to us it would probably be the last time we could all be together in one place. So that's why I went :)
I didn't see my brothers though... not very close to them at all. My Mum had my brothers and Elise from her first marriage. Elise lived with us while we were growing up so we're very close to her but my brothers stayed in Australia and lived with their Dad. Hence the lack of closeness!
Have I explained too much?
I took a few photos and I'm hoping some will turn out... we'll see :)

So what would you think about me coming over to Canada?

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Tuesday, 7 October 2003

Well, I'm back. Plans are afoot. I have a cunning plan.
It was important for me whilst I was away to not only spend meaningful time with my family but to also try to break through this fog that has been engulfing me lately. My mission to see things clearly was successful. So many pennies dropped and I realised just how much I have grown in the past year or so - how far I have come. It was great. Amazing. So empowering. I was filled with such love for my family but also recognising that I need to be away from them. I need to grow into myself. So I made a few decisions though I'm not sure right now is the time to talk about them here.
What can I tell you? I'm very tired right now so forgive me if I seem a little vague.
I was so excited at the prospect of seeing my dad. Excited but also very nervous. Last time I saw him 7 years ago I remember him making a lot of comments about the fact that I was 'chunky', 'chubby', 'big' and whatever other terms he could think of. It really upset me as I never felt quite good enough to him. So this time I wondered what my shortcomings would be. Well I'm pleased to say that there weren't any. We had the loveliest time and it was so great to just be able to pick up where we left off and not feel the need to dredge up the past. My half-sister also decided it was time for her to see him so what a week my poor dad had. It must have been so overwhelming for him. To see his eldest daughter he hadn't seen for 20 years, his step-daughter he hadn't seen for 22 years, and me he hadn't seen for 7. To meet all these wonderful grand-children of his.
I spent the night at his place and the next day we hung out until about mid-afternoon at which point we got in the car to head down to Byron Bay to meet up with my sister and my Mum at the beachhouse. It was so beautiful. I felt so full. My beautiful nephews and nieces, my mum, my sister, my dad, all together again. It was like life coming full circle after 20 years. Life really is amazing.
So these few days away were like a death and a new beginning for me and it's very very exciting.
On a lighter note, because we were staying at the beach house we had prime views over the bay and the dolphins and whales were out in force. I spent a couple of hours at the beach but mostly it rained the whole time I was there.
Did a bit of shopping. Went to the markets and got a reading but I won't tell you about that right now either.
Oops, I'm too tired to keep writing so I guess it's ninite from me for today.

xxx

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